Erma Bombeck Quotes

No self-respecting mother would run out of intimidations on the eve of a major holiday.

Erma Bombeck

House guests should be regarded as perishables: Leave them out too long and they go bad.

Erma BomBeck

There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.

Erma Bombeck

Dreams have but one owner at a time. That is why dreamers are lonely.

Erma Bombeck

The family. We were a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another's desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together.

Erma Bombeck

Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other.

Erma Bombeck

It seemed rather incongruous that in a society of supersophisticated communication, we often suffer from a shortage of listeners.

Erma Bombeck

Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other.

Erma Bombeck

We hit the sunny beaches where we occupy ourselves keeping the sun off our skin, the saltwater off our bodies, and the sand out of our belongings.

Erma Bombeck

Never go to your high school reunion pregnant or they will think that is all you have done since you graduated

Erma Bombeck

In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn't danced on television.

Erma Bombeck

How come anything you buy will go on sale next week?

Erma Bombeck

Never order food in excess of your body weight.

Erma Bombeck

Laughter rises out of tragedy, when you need it the most, and rewards you for your courage.

Erma Bombeck

Laughter rises out of tragedy, when you need it the most, and rewards you for your courage.

Erma Bombeck
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