FRAN LEBOWITZ Quotes

Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky.

Fran Lebowitz

I never took hallucinogenic drugs because I never wanted my consciousness expanded one unnecessary iota.

Fran Lebowitz

Food is an important part of a balanced diet.

Fran Lebowitz

Los Angeles is a large city-like area surrounding the Beverly Hills Hotel.

Fran Lebowitz

The most common error made in matters of appearance is the belief that one should disdain the superficial and let the true beauty of one's soul shine through. If there are places on your body where this is a possibility, you are not attractive--you are leaking.

Fran Lebowitz

Original thought is like original sin: both happened before you were born to people you could not have possibly met.

Fran Lebowitz

Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat.

Fran Lebowitz

In the Soviet Union, capitalism triumphed over communism. In this country, capitalism triumphed over democracy.

Fran Lebowitz

My favorite animal is steak.

Fran Lebowitz

Vegetables are interesting but lack a sense of purpose when unaccompanied by a good cut of meat.

Fran Lebowitz

Large, naked raw carrots are acceptable as food only to those who lie in hutches eagerly awaiting Easter.

Fran Lebowitz

Very few people possess true artistic ability. It is therefore both unseemly and unproductive to irritate the situation by making an effort. If you have a burning, restless urge to write or paint, simply eat something sweet and the feeling will pass.

Fran Lebowitz

The opposite of talking isn't listening. The opposite of talking is waiting.

Fran Lebowitz

Remember that as a teenager you are at the last stage of your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.

Fran Lebowitz

As a teenager you are at the last stage in your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.

Fran Lebowitz

If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words.

Fran Lebowitz
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