I worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.
I don't care to join any club that's prepared to have me as a member
The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open
One of the best hearing aids a man can have is an attentive wife.
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats.
There's one way to find out if a man is honest - ask him. If he says, "Yes," you know he is a crook.
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made.
I won't belong to any organization that would have me as a member
Outside of a dog, a book is probably man’s best friend, and inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read.
Ever since they found out that Lassie was a boy, the public has believed the worst about Hollywood.