Henry Wheeler Shaw Quotes

Their is one advantage in a plurality of wifes; tha fite each other, insted ov their husbands.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

I hope i shall never hav so much reputashun that i shan't feel obliged to be alwus civil.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

I had rather be a pot-bellied seed cowcumber, flung carelessly on a wood pile to ripen, than tew be an old bachelor.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

Marrying for buty iz a poor spekulashun, for enny man who sees yure wife, has got just about az mutch stock in her as yu have.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

Thare iz this mutch kan be sed in favour ov good-breeding, it iz the only thing that kan make a phool endurable.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

Giv every one you meet, my boy, the time ov day and halff the road, and if that dont make him civil dont waste enny more fragrance on the cuss.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

The man who kan ware a paper collar a hole week and keap, it klean, aint fit for enny thing else.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

Thare iz sich a thing az being alwus too quick--i am one ov that kind miself, i alwus miss a rale rode train bi being thare a haff an our too soon.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

There iz only one good substitute for the endearments ov a sister, and that iz the endearments ov sum other pheller's sister.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

I don't rekoleckt now ov ever hearing ov two dogs fiteing unless thare waz a man or two around.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

Thare iz a grate deal ov charity in this world so koldly rendered that it fairly hurts, it iz like lifting a drowning man out ov the water bi the hair ov the hed, and then letting him drop on the ground.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

Menny people spend their time trieing tew find the hole whare sin got into this world--if two men brake through the ice into a mill pond, they had better hunt for sum good hole tew git out, rather than git into a long argument about the hole they cum tew fall in.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

Too mutch religion iz wuss than none at all. Yu kant sho me a kuntry that haz existed yet, whare the people, all ov them, professed one religion and persekuted all other kinds, but what the religion ruined the country.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

Truth dont require the aid ov elegant and high stepping words, tew express its force, or buty, it iz like water, tastes better out ov a wooden bucket, than it duz out ov a golden goblet.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

Them folks who are sudden, aint apt tew be solid; lively streams are alwus shallow.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

Men are often praized for their sagassity, but all the fore sight in the world kant tell a dubble yelked egg untill it itz broken.

Henry Wheeler Shaw
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