~ There are two things you can do with your head down - play golf and pray. ~
~ In case of a thunderstorm, stand in the middle of the fairway and hold up a one iron. Not even God can hit a one iron ~
~ I love it. I don't know if I love it as much as Arnold Palmer, but I think I am close. I can't wait to get up in the mornings because I know I am going out to play golf. The game has been very good to me. Much has been said about when I am going to retire but I never will. ~
~ Columbus went around the world in 1492. That isn't a lot of strokes when you consider the course ~
~ If you're caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron ~
~ One under a tree, one under a bush, one under the water ~
~ I'm a golfaholic, no question about that. Counseling wouldn't help me. They'd have to put me in prison, and then I'd talk the warden into building a
hole or two and teach him how to play. ~
~ If you are caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron ~
~ You can talk to a fade but a hook won't listen ~
~ There are two things that won't last long in this world, and that's dogs chasing cars and pros putting for pars ~
~ Nobody buy you and your caddie care what you do out there, and if your caddie is betting against you, he doesn't care, either ~
~ I'm not out there just to be dancing around. I expect to win every time I tee up ~
~ There is no such thing as a natural touch. Touch is something you create by hitting millions of golf balls ~
~ In the game of life it's a good idea to have a few early losses, which relives you of the pressure of trying to maintain an undefeated season ~
~ His nerve, his memory, and I can't remember the third thing ~
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