Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
One mustn't criticize other people on grounds where he can't stand perpendicular himself
In religion and politics, people's beliefs and convictions are in almost every case gotten at second-hand, and without examination.
God's great cosmic joke on the human race was requiring that men and women live together in marriage
Honesty: The best of all the lost arts
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
Prophesy is a good line of business, but it is full of risks.
Children have but little charity for one another's defects
Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.
In the Spring, I have counted 136 different kinds of weather inside of 24 hours.
If you have nothing to say, say nothing.
In the first place God made idiots. This was for practice. Then he made School Boards.
Eloquence is the essential thing in a speech, not information
Only a government that is rich and safe can afford to be a democracy, for democracy is the most expensive and nefarious kind of government ever heard of on earth