~ The human race has only one really effective weapon and that is laughter. ~
~ Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand. ~
~ When angry, count to four. When very angry, swear. ~
~ Synergy — the bonus that is achieved when things work together harmoniously. ~
~ Education is the path from cocky ignorance to miserable uncertainty. ~
~ Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been. ~
~ Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or freed a human soul. ~
~ You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus. ~
~ When we remember that we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained. ~
~ Advertisements contain the only truths to be relied on in a newspaper. ~
~ There are no grades of vanity, there are only grades of ability in concealing it ~
~ Perseverance is a principle that should be commendable in those who have judgment to govern it ~
~ In the first place God made idiots. This was for practice. Then he made School Boards. ~
~ He gossips habitually; he lacks the common wisdom to keep still that deadly enemy of man, his own tongue ~
~ Photography is 90% sheer, brutal drudgery! ~
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