~ The only reason I ever played golf in the first place was so I could afford to hunt and fish ~
~ Forget your opponents; always play against par. ~
~ If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death ~
~ These greens are so fast I have to hold my putter over the ball and hit it with the shadow. ~
~ Never let up. The more you can win by, the more doubts you put in the other players' minds the next time out ~
~ The greens are harder than a whore's heart ~
~ Thinking instead of acting is the number-one golf disease ~
~ Golf is played with the arms ~
~ The only reason I played golf was so that I could afford to go hunting and fishing ~
~ You've just one problem. You stand too close to the ball after you've hit it. ~
~ Forget your opponents; always play against par. ~
~ The greens are harder than a whore's heart ~
~ Thinking instead of acting is the number-one golf disease ~
~ Golf is played with the arms ~
~ Until you play it, St. Andrews looks like the sort of real estate you couldn't give away ~
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