This page contains quotes from the movie Airplane . You can find more Alphabetized listing of films for which quotations are available in the index page. Thanks to the many celebrated and unheralded screenwriters who have provided these memorable movie quotes and lines of dialogue.


Home >> Moviequotes >> A >> Airplane




Quotes from the movie Airplane
0
What a pisser.
send an e card Striker


I've got to concentrate! I've got to concentrate!
send an e card Striker


I guess the foot's on the other hand now, isn't it, Kramer?
send an e card Striker


The oil pressure, I forgot to check the oil pressure. When Kramer hears about this, the shit's gonna hit the fan.
send an e card Striker


Mostly, I remember the nights when we were together. I remember how you used to hold me and... how I used to sit on your face and wiggle andó
send an e card Elaine


Ladies and gentleman, this is your stewardess speaking. We regret any inconvenience the sudden cabin movement might have caused. This is due to periodic air pockets we encountered. There's no reason to be alarmed and we hope you enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?
send an e card Elaine


Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking.
send an e card McCroskey


Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking.
send an e card McCroskey


Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines.
send an e card McCroskey


Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.
send an e card McCroskey


They're coming right at us!
send an e card McCroskey


The last thing he said to me, "Doc," he said, "Sometime when the crew is up against it, the breaks are beating the boys, tell them to get out there and give it all they got and win just one for the Zipper. I don't know where I'll be then, Doc," he said, "but I won't smell too good, that's for sure."
send an e card Rumack


I just want to tell you both good luck. We're all counting on you.
send an e card Rumack


Loneliness, that's the bottom line. I was never happy as a child... Christmas, Ted, what does that mean to you? It was living hell. Do you know what it's like falling in the mud and getting kicked, in the head? With an iron boot? Of course you don't, no one does, that never happens. Sorry, Ted, skip that, it's a dumb question.
send an e card Kramer


All right, Striker, you listen, and listen close. Flying a plane is no different from riding a bicycle; it's just a lot harder to put baseball cards in the spokes.
send an e card Kramer


Airport management, the FAA and the airlines. They're all cheats and liars. All right, lets get outta here.
send an e card Kramer


Off to the tower? Rapunzel! Rapunzel!
send an e card Johnny


Mayday? Why that's the Russian New Year. You know, we'll have a big parade, we'll serve hot hor'doevres...
send an e card Johnny


MCrosky : Johnny, what can you make outta this? (hands him a piece of paper) Johnny : This? Why I could make a hat, or a brooch, a pterodactyl. . .
send an e card Johnny


Reporter : What kind of plane is it? Johnny : Oh its a big pretty white plane with red stripes, curtains in the window and wheels. It looks like a big tylenol.
send an e card Johnny


MCrosky : Bad news, the fog is getting thicker. Johnny : And Leon's getting laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrger.
send an e card Johnny


Towergy : (holding up a newspaper) Captain, look at this! MCrosky : Passengers certain to die! Kramer : Airline negligent. Johnny : There's a sale at Penny's!
send an e card Johnny


MCrosky : Alright, I'll need 3 men up in the tower. You Newbower, you Maceias. . . Johnny : Me John! Big tree.
send an e card Johnny


All right, give me Hamm on five, hold the Mayo!
send an e card Capt. Oveur


Joey, did ya ever hang around a gymnasium?
send an e card Capt. Oveur


Joey, do you like movies about gladiators?
send an e card Capt. Oveur


Joey, have you ever been in a Turkish prison?
send an e card Capt. Oveur


Have you ever seen a grown man naked?
send an e card Capt. Oveur


They bought their tickets. They knew what they were getting in to. I say, let 'em crash!
send an e card Talk Show Guest


Cut me som' slac' jak! Chump don' wan' no help, chump don' git no help. Jive ass dude don' got no brains anyhow.
send an e card Passenger


Signup for our daily inspirational email newsletter: