Quotes from Movie American Pie

Quotes from the movie American Pie
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~ She called me and asked for my number.~

Steve Stifler

~ Vicky. Jessica. [walking away] Bitches!~

Steve Stifler

~ Well, polish my nuts and serve me a milkshake, haha.~

Steve Stifler

~ I would like to make an announcement. There is a beautiful woman masturbating on my bed.~

Jim

~ I would like to make an announcement. There is a beautiful woman masturbating on my bed.~

Jim

~ You realize we're all going to go to college as virgins. They probably have special dorms for people like us.~

Jim

~ She's gone! Oh my God, she used me. I was used. I was used! Cool!~

Jim

~ have to admit, you know, I did the fair bit of [hesitates] masturbating when I was a little younger. I used to call it stroking the salami, yeah, you know, pounding the old pud. [pause] I never did it with baked goods, but you know your uncle Mort, he pets the one-eyed snake 5-6 times a day.~

Jims Dad

~ Well, they're safer than a tube sock...~

Jims Dad

~ We'll just tell your mother that... we ate it all.~

Jims Dad

~ to Jim] Now, do you know what a clitoris is?~

Jims Dad

~ God bless the Internet.~

Finch

~ I am The Sherminator. I'm a sophisticated sex robot sent back through time, to change the future for one lucky lady.~

Chuck Sherman

~ I don't want any of you boys thinking that you're gonna score. You don't score, until you score!~

Coach Marshall

~ Go trig boy, it's your birthday.~

Garage Band Member

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