I ain't no super hero, lady. I'm just a kid from the neighborhood, all right?
Avoid the reeking herd! Shun the polluted flock! Live like that stoic bird, the eagle of the rock!" You know what that means, son?
Yeah. It's from an Elinor Hoyt Wylie poem. It means stay away from the crowds of common ordinary people and do your own thing.
Nope, it means don't compromise yourself for women. Ain't gonna do you no good. Get away from them as soon as you can!
Well, I ain't got no woman now. So I'm living like the stoic bird, man.
The only way to live, son.
I've had enough bad experiences and growth to last me plenty...Right now, I'd be glad to trade some growth for happiness.
You turned yourself into a comic hero?
I recommend the piŅa coladas. They are excellent and very authentic tasting.
You know, you should try believing in something bigger than yourself. It might cheer you up.
So how smart is she?
I don't know. I guess she's about average.
Average? Hey, man. Average is dumb!
Why does everything in my life have to be such a complicated disaster?!
Man, she's got good looking handwriting.
Hi, Harvey. We finally meet in person.
Hiya. Look, before we get started with any of this, you might as well know right off the bat. I had a vasectomy.
I guess I have a lot of borderline health disorders that limit me politically when it comes to eating.
Harvey, go get me water and a few aspirin.
What, you got a headache?
No, but I want to avoid one.
Harvey, we better skip this whole courtship thing and just get married.
Yes, I consider myself a nerd. And this movie has uplifted me.
Look Toby, the guys in that movie are not 28 year-old file clerks who live with their grandmothers in an ethnic ghetto...They didn't get their computers like you did, by trading in a bunch of box tops and $49.50 at the supermarket...Sure, go to the movies and daydream, but "Revenge of the Nerds" ain't reality. It's just Hollywood bullsh*t.
I'll have you know that I come from a very dysfunctional family. I can spot personality disorders a mile away.