Quotes from the Movie Annie Hall

Don't you have a can of Raid in the house? I told you a thousand times. You should always keep a lot of insect spray. You never know who's gonna crawl over.

Alvy Singer

Did you go to a rock concert?...Oh yeah really, really? How'd you like it? Was it, was it heavy? Did it achieve total heavy-o-city?

Alvy Singer

Why don't you get William F. Buckley to kill the spider?...Are you going with a right-wing rock 'n roll star?

Alvy Singer

Darling, I've been killing spiders since I was thirty, OK?

Alvy Singer

Darling, I've been killing spiders since I was thirty, OK?

Alvy Singer

Honey, there's a spider in your bathroom the size of a Buick.

Alvy Singer

I was a great athlete...I was all-school yard.

Alvy Singer

You know, I don't think I could take a mellow evening because I - I don't respond well to mellow. You know what I mean? I have a tendency to - if I get too mellow, I - I ripen and then rot, you know.

Alvy Singer

The incredible thing about it is, I'm paying for her analysis and she's making progress, and I'm getting screwed...It's absurd. She's making progress and I'm not making any progress. And her progress is killing my progress.

Alvy Singer

She's a 10, Max, and that's great for you because you're - you're used to two's, aren't you?

Alvy Singer

They give awards for that kind of music? I thought just earplugs...They do nothing but give out awards. I can't believe it. Greatest Fascist Dictator - Adolf Hitler!

Alvy Singer

You know how you're always trying to get things to come out perfect in art, because it's real difficult in life.

Alvy Singer

After that, it got pretty late and we both had to go, but it was great seeing Annie again and I realized what a terrific person she was and how much fun it was just knowing her...and I thought of that old joke, you know, the, this, this guy goes to a psychiatrist and says, 'Doc, uh, my brother's crazy, he thinks he's a chicken,' and uh, the doctor says, 'Well why don't you turn him in?' And the guy says, 'I would, but I need the eggs.' Well, I guess that's pretty much now how I feel about relationships. You know, they're totally irrational and crazy and absurd and - but uh, I guess we keep going through it...because...most of us need the eggs.

Alvy Singer

You're the reason that I got out of my room and that I was able to sing and, and, and you know get more in touch with my feelings and all that crap.

Annie Hall

I used to be a heroin addict. Now I'm a methadone addict.

Schoolboy

I'm into leather.

Schoolgirl

You always only saw the worst in people. You never could get along with anyone in school. You were always out of step with the world. Even when you got famous, you still mistrusted the world.

Mrs. Singer

This is Davis ... I forgot my mantra.

Lacey Party Guest

Right now, it's only a notion. But I think I can get money to make it into a concept. And later turn it into an idea.

Partygoer #1

Not only is he a good agent, but he really gives good meeting.

Partygoer #2

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