Quotes from the Movie Arthur (1981)

A real woman could stop you from drinking.

Susan

You're a hooker? Jesus, I forgot! I just thought I was doing GREAT with you!

Arthur

All I can tell you is, I wish I had a dime for every dime I had.

Arthur

Thank you for a memorable afternoon, usually one must go to a bowling alley to meet a woman of your stature.

Hobson

Yes, imagine how wonderful a girl who bathes would be. Get dressed.

Hobson

I race cars, play tennis, and fondle women, BUT! I have weekends off, and I am my own boss.

Arthur

If you and your undershirt will walk two paces backwards, I could enter this dwelling.

Hobson

Yes, I see no reason for prolonging this conversation, unless you're planning to knock over a fruit stand later in the evening.

Hobson

Why don't you forget the moose for a moment!

Burt Johnson

They recently had the whole country carpeted. This is *not* a big place.

Arthur

I've never taken care of anybody. Everybody's always taken care of me. But if you got sick, or anything, I'd take care of you.

Arthur

Everyone who drinks is not a poet. Maybe some of us drink because we're not poets.

Arthur

Isn't this fun? Isn't fun the best thing to have? Don't you wish you were me? I know I do.

Arthur

He gets all that money. Pays his family back by... by... by bein' a stinkin' drunk. It's enough ta make ya sick.

Executive

Hobson, do you know the worst part, the WORST part of being me?

Arthur

Yes... You obviously have a wonderful economy with words, Gloria. I look forward to your next syllable with great eagerness.

Hobson

It's terribly small, tiny little country. Rhode Island could beat the crap out of it in a war. THAT'S how small it is.

Arthur

What I had in mind was spending the night with a stranger who loves me.

Arthur

When I was 11 years old, I KILLED a man.

Burt Johnson

Are you sure you want to be a nightclub comic?

Arthur

Do you have any objection to naming a child Vladimir? Even a girl?

Arthur

Poor drunks do not find love, Arthur. Poor drunks have very few teeth, they urinate outdoors, they freeze to death in summer. I can't bear to think of you that way.

Hobson

I've taken the liberty of anticipating your condition. I have brought you orange juice, coffee, and aspirins. Or do you need to throw up?

Hobson

If I begin to die, please take this off my head. This is not the way I wish to be remembered.

Hobson

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