Quotes from the Movie As Good as It Gets

Carol the waitress, meet Simon the fag.

Melvin Udall

Lucky for you, you're here for rock-bottom... you absolute horror of a human being.

Simon Bishop

I'm losing my apartment, Melvin. And Frank, he wants me to beg my parents, who haven't called me, for help, and I won't. And I don't want to paint any more! So the life that I was trying for, is over. The life that I had is gone, and I'm feeling so damn sorry for myself that it's difficult to breathe.

Simon Bishop

The best thing you have going for you is your willingness to humiliate yourself.

Simon Bishop

If you stare at someone long enough, you discover their humanity.

Simon Bishop

Do you miss the tough guy? [imitating Melvin] Well here I am, sweetheart! C'mere ya little piss-ant mop!

Simon Bishop

Come on in, and try not to ruin everything by being you.

Carol Connelly

Have you ever let a romantic moment make you do something that you knew was stupid?

Carol Connelly

I want your life for one minute where my biggest problem is someone offering me a free convertible so I can get out of this city.

Carol Connelly

You may think you can intimidate the whole world with that attitude but you don't intimidate me. I grew up in hell! My grandmother's got more attitude!

Frank Sachs

I like Simon. I like him enough to batter you unrecognizable if you verbally abuse him or so much as touch his dog again. Meanwhile, I'll try and think how you can make this up to him.

Frank Sachs

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