This page contains quotes from the movie Bad Santa. You can find more Alphabetized listing of films for which quotations are available in the index page. Thanks to the many celebrated and unheralded screenwriters who have provided these memorable movie quotes and lines of dialogue.


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Quotes from the movie Bad Santa
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I said, "Next," goddamn it! This is not the DMV!
Willie


OW! Watch the toenails, kid. Shit!
Willie


I said, "Next," goddamn it! This is not the DMV!
Willie


OW! Watch the toenails, kid. Shit!
Willie


(While on his lunch break a woman comes up to Willie with her child) I'M ON MY FUCKING LUNCH BREAK.
Willie


Sure, the 3 B's.
Willie


Should I fix you some sandwiches?
Kid


I think someone messed with my Advent calendar.
Kid


No one messed with it. What's wrong with you?
Willie


This one has a... candy corn in it.
Kid


Well they can't all be winners.
Willie


I am not gay!
Hindustani Troublemaker


What the hell, buddy?
Willie


Buddy? I said I am not gay!
Hindustani Troublemaker


Yes. But that isn't what this is about. You're as queer as a ten dollar bill.
Hindustani Troublemaker


Leave Santa alone!
Kid


Little boy, don't interfere. I am doing this for all of us.
Hindustani Troublemaker


Leave Santa alone!
Kid


[Willie pulls free. Hindustani Troublemaker turns to leave] Ass clown.
Hindustani Troublemaker


I weigh ninety-two pounds you dick!
Marcus