Quotes from the Movie Clerks II

"Porch Monkey" is a racial slur against black people!

Dante Hicks

What'd you do that for? You realize he just thinks you're trying to get him into a threeway with us now, don't you?

Dante Hicks

You never go ass to mouth!

Dante Hicks

You ever see a chick give a mule a blowjob?

Randal Graves

Alright, look. There's only one Return, ok, and it ain't of the King, it's of the Jedi.

Randal Graves

It's cool. I'm taking it back.

Randal Graves

May your first child be a masculine child!

Randal Graves

My Grandmother wasn't racist...although she did once refer to a broken beer bottle as a "nigger knife".

Randal Graves

I'D BUY THE QUICK STOP AND RE-OPEN IT MYSELF!!! That's what I'd do!

Randal Graves

You're my best friend, and I love you...in a totally heterosexual way. Please don't leave me.

Randal Graves

Who would be friends with me? I hate everyone and everything seems stupid to me.

Randal Graves

I'm telling you this only because I am your friend. Sometimes, in the heat of the moment, it's forgivable to go ass to mouth.

Becky

I'm disgusted, and repulsed, and...I can't look away... (

Becky

Him is so cute! Him thinkin' again, huh?

Emma

That guy's being awfully forward with that donkey.

Jay

Did you know Jesus was a Jew?

Jay

If you're gonna jump let me have a crack at that pussy first.

Jay

I got nothin'.

Silent Bob

I just think you're a gay man in denial!

Silent Bob

I hope that donkey doesn't have a hiney troll!

Elias

What's sexier than an elf princess's sword?

Elias

At Bible Camp we made a flow chart. Since God created man, and man created the Transformers, the Transformers are like a gift from God, Randal!

Elias

Are you looking for a good transformers site? Because at cars2bots.com you can get an avatar of your picture morphed to look like a robot.

Elias

Well at least you spelled "cock" right this time.

Elias

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