Quotes from the Movie Death to Smoochy

Even when you're squeaky clean, you can still fall in the mud.

Rainbow Randolph

I've been shot! I'm bleeding! Salmonella! You're a lawyer! That's salmonella!

Rainbow Randolph

All right, that's it, you bloodsucking freaks! I'm suing your Riverdance act! Have you all shipped back home, eh?!

Rainbow Randolph

Bite me, Buddha!

Rainbow Randolph

Do not start with your magician's tricks, young Moses! I am Pharaoh! And you are my slave...and this is my kingdom!

Rainbow Randolph

When my brothers and I played cowboys and Indians, I was always the Chinese railroad worker.

Sheldon Mopes/Smoochy

He slams the door, He stomps his feet, He sends me to bed with zilch to eat. But my step-dad's not mean, he's just adjusting.

Sheldon Mopes/Smoochy

Captain Kangaroo, like Jesus Christ, was someone you could really believe in. With those guys, it wasn't about the bells and whistles and the rickety-rackety; it was all about the work. Especially Jesus.

Sheldon Mopes/Smoochy

Now I'm not pointing any fingers, Lord knows you start pointing fingers and someone's gonna get poked. And I want you both to know that its not my intention to try and...poke either of you.

Sheldon Mopes/Smoochy

You can't change the world but you can make a dent.

Sheldon Mopes/Smoochy

Someone toss me a beach towel because my head is swimming.

Sheldon Mopes/Smoochy

Don't talk to me like that. I am not your puppet.

Sheldon Mopes/Smoochy

Let's face it. Big junkies come from little junkies. We gotta nip this in the bud, Burke!

Sheldon Mopes/Smoochy

Let's face it. Big junkies come from little junkies. We gotta nip this in the bud, Burke!

Sheldon Mopes/Smoochy

He was jacked up higher than a prom dress in June.

Angelo Pike

It's a shame this happened. Okay, now let's go pray and get shit-faced.

Tommy Kotter

You're here to sell sugar and plastic.

Nora Wells

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