Quotes from the Movie Heathers

The only place different social types can genuinely get along with each other is in heaven.

J.D.

Football season is over, Veronica. Kurt and Ram had nothing left to offer the school except for date rapes and AIDS jokes.

J.D.

I can't believe you did it. I was teasing. I loved you. Course, I was coming up here to kill ya...

J.D.

I knew that loose was too noose... uh... noose too loose...

J.D.

"We, students at Westerburg High, will die. Today. Our burning bodies will be the ultimate protest to a society that degrades us. Fuck you all!"

J.D.

You wanted to be a member of the most powerful clique in school. If I wasn't already the head of it, I'd want the same thing.

Heather Chandler

You blow it tonight, girl, and it's keggers with kids all next year.

Heather Chandler

Grow up, Heather, bulimia is so '87.

Heather Chandler

You were nothing before you met me. You were playing Barbies with Betty Finn. You were a Bluebird. You were a Brownie. You were a Girl Scout Cookie.

Heather Chandler

Transfer to Washington. Transfer to Jefferson. No one at Westerberg is going to let you play their reindeer games.

Heather Chandler

Intense... grow up. You think I'll drink it just because you call me chicken...? Just gimmie the cup, jerk.

Heather Chandler

Corn...nuts!

Heather Chandler

Veronica, why are you pulling my dick?

Heather Duke

I prayed for the death of Heather Chandler many times and I felt bad everytime I did it but I kept doing it anyway. Now I know you understood everything. Praise Jesus, Hallelujah.

Heather Duke

Whether or not a teenager decides to kill themselves is the biggest decision of their life.

Counselor

Now I've seen a lot of bullshit... angel dust, switchblades, sexually perverse photography involving tennis rackets...

Principal

It's so great to be able to talk to a girl and not have to ask "What's your major?". I hate that... . So, when you go to college, what subjects do you think you'll study?

Brad

Dear Lord, please make sure this never happens to me because I don't think I could handle suicide. Fast, early acceptance into an Ivy League school and please let it be Harvard. Amen.

Pete

When teenagers complain that they want to be treated like human beings, it's usually because they are being treated like human beings.

Veronica's Mom

We must pray the other teenagers of Sherwood, Ohio, know the name of that righteous dude who can solve their problems: it's Jesus Christ, and he's in the Book.

Father Ripper

Jesus, God in heaven, why'd you have to kill such hot snatch? It's a joke, man. Geez, people are so serious. Holy Mary pray for our sinners, so we don't get caught. Geez, another joke man.

Jock

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