Quotes from the Movie Kicking and Screaming

What I used to able to pass off as a bad summer could now potentially turn into a bad life.

Max

You have a drinking problem. Get help!

Max

That is a bad habit. You really need to finish that in the bathroom.

Max

Don't check your bags, they'll just lose them.

Max

This is useless. We just have to walk away like mothers in nursery school.

Max

I found myself writing 'wake up' and 'go to bed' in my day planner as if they are two different events.

Max

Cool! A dictionary! I'm gonna look up blowjob.

Otis

There's also that dark side to the nose ring.

Otis

I think I'm gonna switch back to briefs.

Otis

There's food in the beer!

Otis

It looks like a chicken wing or a cheese fry.

Otis

Cookie Man?

Otis

I almost wore my goatee tonight. Wouldn't that have been embarrassing?

Grover

Oh, I've been to Prague.

Grover

Prague... you'll come back a bug...

Grover

If Plato is a fine red wine, then Aristotle is a dry martini.

Chet

How do you make God laugh? Make a plan.

Chet

I begged you not to get off Prozac.

Skippy

I'll tell you the worst part about losing a foot.

Guy at party

Well my brother's gay so... I know!

Girl at bar

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