This page contains quotes from the movie Mystery Men . You can find more Alphabetized listing of films for which quotations are available in the index page. Thanks to the many celebrated and unheralded screenwriters who have provided these memorable movie quotes and lines of dialogue.


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Quotes from the movie Mystery Men
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"Now , there's a wedgie she won't soon forget."
The Bowler


"Who would want to rent a chicken?"
The Bowler


"Now I'm going back to Graduate School. That was the agreement."
The Bowler


"No dad, He's neither a commie, nor a fruit."
The Bowler


"There's not enough beer in the world Spleen, I'm sorry."
The Bowler


"You must be like the wolf pack... not like the six-pack."
The Sphinx


"You must lash out with every limb, like the octopus who plays the drums."
The Sphinx


"Learn to hide your strikes from your opponent and you'll more easily strike his hide."
The Sphinx


"When you can balance a tack hammer on your head, you will head off your foes with a balanced attack."
The Sphinx


"He who questions training only trains himself at asking questions."
The Sphinx


"Casanova will have many weapons. To defeat him we will need to have more than forks and flatulence."
The Sphinx


"Do not go there, my son! When you doubt your powers, you give power to your doubts."
The Sphinx


"We are number one! All others are number two, or lower."
The Sphinx


"Hello, Champion City. Daddy... is home!"
Casanova Frankenstein


"When the clock strikes twelve... cuckoo, cuckoo... you will be dead. And my city will be given a new state of mind."
Casanova Frankenstein


"Tonight I am going to do to Champion City what I have done to its greatest superhero ó und there will still be time to go up, get down... und boogie!"
Casanova Frankenstein


"I have created a beautiful machine that is going to encourage our fellow citizens to share my vision of the future! Can you dig it?"
Casanova Frankenstein


"A fish-fork is no match for my machine!"
Casanova Frankenstein


"It is so easy to get the better of people when they care about each other ó which is why evil will always have the edge."
Casanova Frankenstein


"No, no. I don't live here. I'm just here for the ladies."
Doctor Heller


"I don't make anything that's deadly."
Doctor Heller


"Totally nonlethal, but totally effective."
Doctor Heller


"That's a high-temperature fabric adhesive liquid projector, based on simple dry-cleaning technology. You aim that at a guy, and I'll tell you something: his clothes get so tight he can't even breathe."
Doctor Heller


"I can trick that out with a clam-shell holster. It comes with a leather carrying case. It's got a wadcutter and a full warranty."
Doctor Heller


"It's a psycho-frakulator! It creates a-a cloud of radically fluctuating deviant chaotrons, which penetrate the synaptic relays. It's concantenated with a-a synchronous transport switch that creates a virtual tributary! It's focused onto a biobolic reflector and what happens is, is that hallucinations become reality... and the brain is literally fried from within."
Doctor Heller