This page contains quotes from the movie Never Give a Sucker an Even Break. You can find more Alphabetized listing of films for which quotations are available in the index page. Thanks to the many celebrated and unheralded screenwriters who have provided these memorable movie quotes and lines of dialogue.


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Quotes from the movie Never Give a Sucker an Even Break
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Hi ya tootie-pie. Everything under control? All five of 'em hit me at once.
The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill


No extra charge for the cold shower I hope.
The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill


I don't know why I ever come in here - The flies get the best of everything.
The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill


Do you travel as one person or do you get a party rate of ten?
The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill


Get plenty of sleep. That's what the doctor told me.
The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill


Why didn't I think of that parachute? What a bump!
The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill


Don't you want to live in this beautiful nest, have a personal maid, wear a diaphanous gown, and eat regularly?
The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill


I feel as though somebody stepped on my tongue with muddy feet.
The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill


There's no sense arguing with a woman.
The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill


Lucky we didn't have an accident...We'd never have made it.
The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill


This script is an insult to a man's intelligence - even mine...It's impossible, inconceivable, incomprehensible, and besides that, it's no good. And as for the continuity, it's terrible.
Mr. Pangborn


Marvelous. Wonderful. Amazing. The girl has been living on a mountaintop since she was three months old and for no reason at all, suddenly blossoms out with Jump and Jive. Do you actually think I'm a dope? Now don't you answer that.
Mr. Pangborn


If that girl is as beautiful as you say, I'll scale the wall tomorrow.
Peter Carson


You must be a professional.
Ouliotta Delight Hemoglobin


My Uncle Bill...But I still love him.
Gloria Jean