Quotes from the Movie Never Give a Sucker an Even Break

Hi ya tootie-pie. Everything under control? All five of 'em hit me at once.

The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill

No extra charge for the cold shower I hope.

The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill

I don't know why I ever come in here - The flies get the best of everything.

The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill

Do you travel as one person or do you get a party rate of ten?

The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill

Get plenty of sleep. That's what the doctor told me.

The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill

Why didn't I think of that parachute? What a bump!

The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill

Don't you want to live in this beautiful nest, have a personal maid, wear a diaphanous gown, and eat regularly?

The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill

I feel as though somebody stepped on my tongue with muddy feet.

The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill

There's no sense arguing with a woman.

The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill

Lucky we didn't have an accident...We'd never have made it.

The Great Man, W.C. Fields Uncle Bill

This script is an insult to a man's intelligence - even mine...It's impossible, inconceivable, incomprehensible, and besides that, it's no good. And as for the continuity, it's terrible.

Mr. Pangborn

Marvelous. Wonderful. Amazing. The girl has been living on a mountaintop since she was three months old and for no reason at all, suddenly blossoms out with Jump and Jive. Do you actually think I'm a dope? Now don't you answer that.

Mr. Pangborn

If that girl is as beautiful as you say, I'll scale the wall tomorrow.

Peter Carson

You must be a professional.

Ouliotta Delight Hemoglobin

My Uncle Bill...But I still love him.

Gloria Jean

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