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Iím a virgin. I always have been.
I've borked tons of women.
Is it true that if you don't use it, you lose it?
I hope you have a big trunk, 'cause I'm puttin' my bike in it.
Me so horny. Me love you long time.
And now I am going to make your silver pants blue.
You know what? I respect women! I love women! I respect them so much I completely stay away from them!
There were two sides to that billboard, and they both hurt equally.
You know, when you, like, you grab a woman's breast and it's... and you feel it and... it feels like a bag of sand when you're touching it.
Is this that movie about babies that are geniuses?
That's a mentos. They're the freshmaker.
Hey, enjoy that orange.
Yup. She was a ho. For sho.
By the way I'm not in the stockroom anymore, I'm a FLOOR MANAGER!
You know, I always thought that Matt Damon was like a Streisand, but I think he's rockin' the shit in this one!
If I have to hear "Yah Mo B There" one more time, I'm gonna "Yah Mo" burn this place to the ground.
No... uncool? Uncool is trying to give an honest man a big box of porn, Andy!
My Uncle Used to Drive a Hoe Runner.
Know how i know you're gay? Because you like Asia.
I like your sweater. Does it come in a V-neck?
Dude, you look like a man-o-lantern.
I wanna take you to Paris and make love to you under the Eiffel Tower.
Ya know, that's okay with me. If she wants to go around and be a little bitch and blow everybody that's fine with me.
And this is...this is Everybody loves Raymond...This...I...This probably shouldn't be in here...This is a good show though, I just tape this sometimes.
He's a really nice guy and all but I'm pretty sure that he is a serial murderer.
I'll tell you who's the hottest. Now you're gonna think I'm crazy when I tell you this; Gina. I can't get Gina outta' my head. I'm gonna be thinking of Gina all week.
I hired a 90-Ib girl to work in the stock room at Smart Tech for you, okay? I should've hired a 300-Ib guy to lift the 60-inch flat screen, but instead I hired a hot girl who can't lift an iPod to bring you out of your funk.
I touched a guy's balls at Hebrew School once.
Leave my torso alone at least!
Screw these analogies, okay? What he's saying is that you are gonna be so bad at sex the first time that you don't wanna have sex with someone you like, 'cause they'll think you're a weirdo for being so lame at it. So you wanna have sex with "hood rats" so that by the time you get to a girl that you "do like, you won't be terrible at sex, you'll be mediocre at it.[pause] Probably still pretty bad, though.
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