Golf Quotes & Sayings :: Finest Quotes

~ If you're caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron ~

Lee Trevino

~ Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun. ~

Jim Bishop

~ I know I am getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer spectators. ~

Gerald Ford

~ Play it as it lies" is one of the fundamental dictates of golf. The other is "Wear it if it clashes ~

Henry Beard

~ It is more satisfying to be a bad player at golf. The worse you play, the better you remember the occasional good shot. ~

Nubar Gulbenkian

~ After all these years, it's still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye ~

Chi Chi Rodriguez

~ It took me seventeen years to get 3,000 hits. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course. ~

Hank Aaron

~ One of the most fascinating things about golf is how it reflects the cycle of life. No matter what you shoot - the next day you have to go back to the first tee and begin all over again and make yourself into something ~

Peter Jacobsen

~ A golf ball is like a clock. Always hit it at 6 o'clock and make it go toward 12 o'clock. But make sure you're in the same time zone ~

Chi Chi Rodriguez

~ Golf isn't like other sports where you can take a player out if he's having a bad day. You have to play the whole game ~

Phil Blackmar

~ Golf is the cruelest game, because eventually it will drag you out in front of the whole school, take your lunch money and slap you around. ~

Rick Reilly

~ Golf is essentially an exercise in masochism conducted out-of-doors. ~

Paul O\'Neil

~ Golf is not a game, it's bondage. It was obviously devised by a man torn with guilt, eager to atone for his sins. ~

Jim Murray

~ Golf is an awkward set of bodily contortions designed to produce a graceful result. ~

Tommy Armour

~ Who watches golf on TV? Who calls eight friends over and gets a keg of beer? Landscapers, I guess. They sit around the TV, yelling, "Will you look at that golf path? Pure pea gravel." ~

Jeff Cesario

~ Golf is a game in which you yell "fore," shoot six, and write down five ~

Paul Harvey

~ In golf, you keep your head down and follow through. In the vice presidency, you keep your head up and follow through. It's a big difference. ~

Dan Quayle

~ Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps ~

Tiger Woods

~ There are two things you can do with your head down - play golf and pray. ~

Lee Trevino

~ Golf is not just an exercise; it's an adventure, a romance... a Shakespeare play in which disaster and comedy are intertwined. ~

Harold Segall

~ Golf is a game where white men can dress up as black pimps and get away with it. ~

Robin Williams

~ Golf is hockey at the halt. ~

Arthur Marshall

~ There is one thing in this world that is dumber than playing golf. That is watching someone else playing golf. What do you actually get to see? Thirty-seven guys in polyester slacks squinting at the sun. Doesn't that set your blood racing? ~

Peter Andrews

~ The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. It's almost a law ~

H.G. Wells

~ The game of golf would lose a great deal if croquet mallets and billiard cues were allowed on the putting green. ~

Ernest Hemingway

~ One of the advantages bowling has over golf is that you seldom lose a bowling ball. ~

Don Carter

~ I'm a golfaholic, no question about that. Counseling wouldn't help me. They'd have to put me in prison, and then I'd talk the warden into building a hole or two and teach him how to play. ~

Lee Trevino

~ A "gimme" can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers, neither of whom can putt very well. ~

Unknown

~ Give me the fresh air, a beautiful partner, and a nice round of golf, and you can keep the fresh air and the round of golf. ~

Jack Benny

~ Golf is a game in which the ball lies poorly and the players well. ~

Art Rosenbaum

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