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~ I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles ~  ~ If you break 100, watch your golf. If you break 80, watch your business. ~ ~ I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced. ~ ~ Golf balls are attracted to water as unerringly as the eye of a middle-aged man to a female bosom. ~ ~ Drugs are very much a part of professional sports today, but when you think about it, golf is the only sport where the players aren't penalized for
being on grass ~ ~ I'd play every day if I could. It's cheaper than a shrink and there are no telephones on my golf cart. ~ ~ If you're caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron ~ ~ Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun. ~ ~ Play it as it lies" is one of the fundamental dictates of golf. The other is "Wear it if it clashes ~ ~ It is more satisfying to be a bad player at golf. The worse you play, the better you remember the occasional good shot. ~ ~ After all these years, it's still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye ~ ~ It took me seventeen years to get 3,000 hits. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course. ~  |
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Quotes with keyword Golf
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