Quotes on Golf :: Finest Quotes

Golf Quotes

The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has.

Will Rogers

I don't want to play golf. When I hit a ball, I want someone else to go chase it.

Rogers Hornsby

It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place this world is when one is playing golf.

Robert Lynd

Golf is so popular simply because it is the best game in the world at which to be bad

A.A. Milne

Golf, like the measles, should be caught young, for, if postponed to riper years, the results may be serious

P.G. Wodehouse

I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone's golf game: it's called an eraser.

Arnold Palmer

Golf is a game that is played on a five-inch course - the distance between your ears.

Bobby Jones

Golf is like a love affair. If you don't take it seriously, it's no fun; if you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart.

Arthur Daley

Golf is a fascinating game. It has taken me nearly forty years to discover that I can't play it.

Ted Ray

If there is any larceny in a man, golf will bring it out.

Paul Gallico

It's easy to see golf not as a game at all but as some whey-faced, nineteenth-century Presbyterian minister's fever dream of exorcism achieved through ritual and self-mortification.

Bruce McCall

If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better than it is

Horace G. Hutchinson

They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. Golf is more complicated than that.

Gardner Dickinson

I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate your enemies

Will Rogers

If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death

Sam Snead

Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness.

William Wordsworth

Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick

P.J. O\'Rourke

Golf is a good walk spoiled.

Mark Twain

I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles

G.K. Chesterton

If you break 100, watch your golf. If you break 80, watch your business.

Joey Adams

I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced.

Miller Barber and Lee Trevino

In baseball you hit your home run over the right-field fence, the left-field fence, the center-field fence. Nobody cares. In golf everything has got to be right over second base.

Ken Harrelson

Golf balls are attracted to water as unerringly as the eye of a middle-aged man to a female bosom.

Michael Green

Drugs are very much a part of professional sports today, but when you think about it, golf is the only sport where the players aren't penalized for being on grass

Bob Hope

I'd play every day if I could. It's cheaper than a shrink and there are no telephones on my golf cart.

Brent Musburger

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