Golf Quotes

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. It's almost a law

H.G. Wells

There is one thing in this world that is dumber than playing golf. That is watching someone else playing golf. What do you actually get to see? Thirty-seven guys in polyester slacks squinting at the sun. Doesn't that set your blood racing?

Peter Andrews

Golf is hockey at the halt.

Arthur Marshall

Golf is a game where white men can dress up as black pimps and get away with it.

Robin Williams

Golf is not just an exercise; it's an adventure, a romance... a Shakespeare play in which disaster and comedy are intertwined.

Harold Segall

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps

Tiger Woods

In golf, you keep your head down and follow through. In the vice presidency, you keep your head up and follow through. It's a big difference.

Dan Quayle

Golf is a game in which you yell "fore," shoot six, and write down five

Paul Harvey

Who watches golf on TV? Who calls eight friends over and gets a keg of beer? Landscapers, I guess. They sit around the TV, yelling, "Will you look at that golf path? Pure pea gravel."

Jeff Cesario

Golf is an awkward set of bodily contortions designed to produce a graceful result.

Tommy Armour

Golf is essentially an exercise in masochism conducted out-of-doors.

Paul O'Neil

Golf is the cruelest game, because eventually it will drag you out in front of the whole school, take your lunch money and slap you around.

Rick Reilly

Golf isn't like other sports where you can take a player out if he's having a bad day. You have to play the whole game

Phil Blackmar

A golf ball is like a clock. Always hit it at 6 o'clock and make it go toward 12 o'clock. But make sure you're in the same time zone

Chi Chi Rodriguez

One of the most fascinating things about golf is how it reflects the cycle of life. No matter what you shoot - the next day you have to go back to the first tee and begin all over again and make yourself into something

Peter Jacobsen
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