golf Quotes

I would like to deny all allegations by Bob Hope that during my last game of golf, I hit an eagle, a birdie, an elk and a moose.

Gerald Ford

Some of us worship in churches, some in synagogues, some on golf courses.

Adlai Stevenson

I can airmail the golf ball, but sometimes I don't put the right address on it.

Jim Dent

Golf is life. If you can't take golf, you can't take life.

Unknown

When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit.

Unknown

The sport of choice for the urban poor is basketball. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is bowling. The sport of choice for front-line workers is football. The sport of choice for supervisors is baseball. The sport of choice for middle management is tennis. The sport of choice for corporate officers is golf. Conclusion: The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.

Unknown

Golf is a lot of walking, broken up by disappointment and bad arithmetic.

Unknown

Golf is like an 18-year-old girl with big boobs. You know it's wrong but you can't keep away from her

Val Doonican

Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five

John Updike

It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course

Hank Aaron

one shot at a time and then move on. Remember that golf is just

Nancy Lopez

For example, in my district there are visitors from all over the world who are drawn to our beautiful beaches, recreational lakes, habitat wildlife preserves and golf courses.

Mark Foley

The only reason I played golf was so that I could afford to go hunting and fishing

Sam Snead

Don't play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty

Harry Vardon

The trees taunt you; the sand mocks you; the water calls your name and they say golf is a quiet game

Unknown

Don't play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty.

Harry Vardon

Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf.

Gene Perret

The place of the father in the modern suburban family is a very small one, particularly if he plays golf.

Bertrand Russell

I love it. I don't know if I love it as much as Arnold Palmer, but I think I am close. I can't wait to get up in the mornings because I know I am going out to play golf. The game has been very good to me. Much has been said about when I am going to retire but I never will.

Lee Trevino

Baseball reveals character; golf exposes it.

Ernie Banks

Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.

Dave Barry

It's great to be hosting SNL again. I hosted sixteen years ago. Back then I was in great shape, I was coming off an MVP season with the Phoenix Suns - now, I play bad golf, drink, sometimes I get arrested.

Charles Barkley

I have been taking stock of my 50 years since I left Wichita. How I have existed fills me with horror for I failed in everything. Spelling, arithmetic, writing, swimming, tennis, golf, dancing, singing, acting, wife, mistress, whore, friend, even cooking. And I do not excuse myself with the usual escape of not trying. I tried with all my heart.

Louise Brooks
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