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~ All requests for leave of absence on account of grandmother's funeral, sore throat, housecleaning, lame back, turning of the ringer, headaches, brain storm, cousin's wedding, general ailments or other legitimate excuses must be made out and handed to the boss not later than 10 a.m. on the morning of the game ~


~ Traditional gag notice hung in offices and factories at a time period when all games were played during daylight hours ~


~ It ain't nothin' till I call it. ~


~ Baseball isn't a business, it's more like a disease ~


~ Baseball wrong - man with four balls cannot walk ~


~ Baseball is like church. Many attend but few understand ~


~ Ideally, the umpire should combine the integrity of a Supreme Court judge, the physical agility of an acrobat, the endurance of Job and the imperturbability of Buddha. ~


~ Strikeouts are boring - besides that, they're fascist. Throw some ground balls. More democratic ~
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~ Baseball? It's just a game - as simple as a ball and a bat. Yet, as complex as the American spirit it symbolizes. It's a sport, business - and sometimes even religion. ~


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