Funny quotes Quotes

Kissing is like drinking salted water. You drink, and your thirst increases.

Chinese Proverb

The two women exchanged the kind of glance women use when no knife is handy.

Ellery Queen

When a man talks dirty to a woman, it's sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $3.95 a minute.


A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy but won't cross the street to vote in a national election

Bill Vaughn

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.

Rodney Dangerfield

In many instances, marriage vows would be more accurate if the phrase were changed to 'Until debt do us part'

Sam Ewing

How are men and parking spots alike? The good ones are always taken. Free ones are mostly handicapped or extremely small.


Children aren't happy without something to ignore, And that's what parents were created for

Ogden Nash

Children really brighten up a household - they never turn the lights off

Ralph Bus

Children always know when company is in the living room - they can hear their mother laughing at their father's jokes


The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any.

Fred Astaire

Babies are such a nice way to start people

Don Herold

Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought particularly for people who can never remember where they have left things.

Woody Allen

The Internet will be the evolutionary mechanism that allows us to play an eternal game of intelligence Leap-Frog. I look forward to leap frogging with you.

Tony Buzan

There is, I think, humor here which does not translate well from English into sanity.

Jim Butcher

How to Overcome Your Fear of Success!

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Updated On : February 20, 2014
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