Golf Quotes

One almost expects one of the players to peer into the monitor and politely request viewers to refrain from munching so loudly on cheese and crackers while the golfers are trying to reach the greens.

Pete Alfano

Men who would face torture without a word become blasphemous at the short fourteenth. It is clear that the game of golf may well be included in that category of intolerable provocations which may legally excuse or mitigate behaviour not otherwise excusable.

A.P. Herbert

All I've got against it is that it takes you so far from the clubhouse

Eric Linklater

Baseball players quit playing and they take up golf. Basketball players quit, take up golf. Football players quit, take up golf. What are we supposed to take up when we quit?

George Archer

A golf course outside a big town serves an excellent purpose in that it segregates, as though a concentration camp, all the idle and idiot well-to-do

Osbert Sitwell

It's good sportsmanship not to pick up lost balls while they are still rolling.

Mark Twain

Find a man with both feet firmly on the ground and you've found a man about to make a difficult putt

Fletcher Knebel

Golf and sex are the only things you can enjoy without being good at them.

Jimmy DeMaret

If you call on God to improve the results of a shot while it is still in motion, you are using "an outside agency" and subject to appropriate penalties under the rules of golf.

Henry Longhurst

The difference between golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie.

George Deukmejian

I don't exaggerate - I just remember big

Chi Chi Rodriguez

There's no game like golf: you go out with three friends, play eighteen holes, and return with three enemies

Unknown

Golf is deceptively simple and endlessly complicated

Arnold Palmer

It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling

Mark Twain

Always make a total effort, even when the odds are against you

Arnold Palmer