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~ Peter Alliss is astounded by a put or shot at the British Open ~
 ~ The mind messes up more shots than the body ~
~ In Africa some of the native tribes have a custom of beating the ground with clubs and uttering spine chilling cries. Anthropologists call this a form of self expression. In America we call it golf ~
~ Golf is like marbles for adults ~
~ Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe. ~
~ Golf is a game in which one endeavors to control a ball with implements ill adapted for the purpose. ~
~ I don't say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes they'd come up sliced. ~
~ I have spent most of my life golfing ..... the rest I have just wasted. ~
~ I am hitting the woods just great ..... but having a terrible time getting out of them! ~
~ The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flag stick on top. ~
~ You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work ~
~ How did you make a twelve? I had a long put for an eleven ~
~ I'm the best. I just haven't played yet. ~
~ Bad Sausage and five bogeys will give you a stomach ache every time ~
~ I don't care to join any club that's prepared to have me as a member ~
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Golf Quotes
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