Quotes from the Movie Billy Madison

I can see your lips moving, but I can't make out the words... I'm deaf! Oh, Veronica Vaughn... Sooo hot... Want to touch the hiney... AROOO-OO!

Billy Madison

It's nudie magazine day!

Billy Madison

He called the shit poop!

Billy Madison

Well, I could think of three things I'd like to do. One would involve some ice cubes and a nine iron. Two would involve a buffalo, live or stuffed, preferably stuffed for safety sake, and three, we bring back some of those ice cubes and switch it over to a pitching wedge.

Billy Madison

Well, I made the duck blue because I've never seen a blue duck before, and, to be honest with you, I wanted to see a blue duck.

Billy Madison

That's quacktastic!

Billy Madison

Is that it, Dad? Did the penguin tell you to do this?

Billy Madison

JUST DO IT!!!

Billy Madison

GIVE ME THE GODDAMN SNACKPACK!!!

Billy Madison

To...to...to...today junior

Billy Madison

Back to school. Back to school, to prove to Dad that I'm not a fool. I got my lunch packed up, my boots tied tight, I hope I don't get in a fight. Ohhhh, back to school. Back to school. Back to school. Well, here goes nothing.

Billy Madison

Shampoo is better; I go on first and clean the hair! Conditioner is better; I leave the hair silky and smooth! Oh, really, fool? Really! Stop looking at me, swan!

Billy Madison

Oh. I see how it is, sooo sorry to interupt.

Billy Madison

Yah aint cool unless..... Yah pee yah pants.

Billy Madison

All the kids in high school pee their pants- it's the coolest.

Billy Madison