Quotes from the Movie Batman Returns

Odd as it may seem, Max, you and I have something in common. We're both perceived as monsters. But somehow, you're a well respected monster, and I am... to date... not.

The Penguin/Oswald Cobblepot

Tragic irony or Poetic Justice? You tell me Max.

The Penguin/Oswald Cobblepot

I was their number one son, and they treated me like number two! But it's human nature to fear the unusual.

The Penguin/Oswald Cobblepot

Just the pussy I've been looking for.

The Penguin/Oswald Cobblepot

You're beauty and the beast in one luscious Christmas gift pack.

The Penguin/Oswald Cobblepot

Just relax. I'll take care of the squealing, wretched pinhead puppets of Gotham... You got to admit, I've played this stinking city like a harp from hell!

The Penguin/Oswald Cobblepot

He didn't even lose a limb, an eyeball... bladder control!

The Penguin/Oswald Cobblepot

Why is it that someone always brings eggs and tomatoes to a speech?!

The Penguin/Oswald Cobblepot

They wouldn't put me on a pedestal, so I'm layin' 'em on a slab!

The Penguin/Oswald Cobblepot

But what it all comes down to is, who's holding the umbrella?!

The Penguin/Oswald Cobblepot

And you're the hottest young person a role model could have. Here, wear a button.

The Penguin/Oswald Cobblepot

You didn't invite me, so I crashed!

The Penguin/Oswald Cobblepot

AUGH! SHIT! I PICKED THE CUTE ONE... UGH, AGHH! This heat's gettin' to me... AUGH... I'll murder you momentarily... *chokes* But first, I need a cold drink of ice water... *falls over gurgling and choking, dead*

The Penguin/Oswald Cobblepot

Wow! The Batman... or is it just Batman?

Catwoman/Selina Kyle

Honey, I'm home! Oh, I forgot. I'm not married.

Catwoman/Selina Kyle