WILL ROGERS Quotes

If we have Senators and Congressmen there that can't protect themselves against the evil temptations of lobbyists, we don't need to change our lobbies, we need to change our representatives

Will Rogers

We are sure living in a peculiar time. You get more for not working than you will for working, and more for not raising a hog than for raising it

Will Rogers

I guess truth can hurt you worse in an election than about anything that can happen to you.

Will Rogers

I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.

Will Rogers

Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there

Will Rogers

There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.

Will Rogers

This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer

Will Rogers

An onion can make people cry, but there has never been a vegetable invented to make them laugh

Will Rogers

A conference is just an admission that you want somebody to join you in your troubles.

Will Rogers

Too many people spend money they haven't earned, to buy things they don't want, to impress people they don't like.

Will Rogers

Successful colleges will start laying plans for a new stadium; unsuccessful ones will start hunting a new coach.

Will Rogers

You can't say civilization isn't advancing: in every war, they kill you in a new way.

Will Rogers

The difference between a Republican and a Democrat is the Democrat is a cannibal -- they have to live off each other--while the Republicans, why, they live off the Democrats.

Will Rogers

There is nothing so stupid as an educated man, if you get off the thing that he was educated in.

Will Rogers

The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, "How is the president?"

Will Rogers

You can't legislate intelligence and common sense into people

Will Rogers

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