If we have Senators and Congressmen there that can't protect themselves against the evil temptations of lobbyists, we don't need to change our lobbies, we need to change our representatives
We are sure living in a peculiar time. You get more for not working than you will for working, and more for not raising a hog than for raising it
Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need.
Rumor travels faster, but it don't stay put as long as truth.
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there
There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.
This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer
An onion can make people cry, but there has never been a vegetable invented to make them laugh
Too many people spend money they haven't earned, to buy things they don't want, to impress people they don't like.
There is nothing so stupid as an educated man, if you get off the thing that he was educated in.
Diplomats are just as essential to starting a war as soldiers are for finishing it... You take diplomacy out of war, and the thing would fall flat in a week.
You can't legislate intelligence and common sense into people
Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have
The trouble with our praying is, we just do it as a means of last resort.
Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated.
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