Quotes from the Movie Zoolander

I'm pretty sure there's more to life than being really, really good looking, and I plan on finding out what that is.

Derek Zoolander

Moisture is the essence of wetness, and wetness is the essence of beauty.

Derek Zoolander

Have you ever wondered if there was more to life, other than being really, really, ridiculously good looking?

Derek Zoolander

I'm not an ambi-turner.

Derek Zoolander

I think I'm geting the black lung, Pop. It's not very well ventilated down there.

Derek Zoolander

But why male models?

Derek Zoolander

Who am I? I don't know.

Derek Zoolander

Wait a minute. I might just have an idea. They'll be looking for us at Maury's right? But they won't be looking for... not us.

Derek Zoolander

There was a moment last night, when she was sandwiched between the two Finnish dwarves and the Maori tribesmen, where I thought, "Wow, I could really spend the rest of my life with this woman."

Derek Zoolander

Do you understand that the world does not revolve around you and your "do whatever it takes, ruin as many people's lives, so long as you can make a name for yourself as an investigatory journalist, no matter how many friends you lose or people you leave dead and bloodied along the way, just so long so you can make a name for yourself as an investigatory journalist, no matter how many friends you lose or people you leave dead and bloodied and dying along the way"?...

Derek Zoolander

Rufus, Brint, and Meekus were like brothers to me. And when I say brother, I don't mean, like, an actual brother, but I mean it like the way black people use it. Which is more meaningful, I think.

Derek Zoolander

If there is anything that this horrible tragedy can teach us, it's that a male model's life is a precious, precious commodity. Just because we have chiseled abs and stunning features, it doesn't mean that we too can't not die in a freak gasoline fight accident.

Derek Zoolander

You think that you're too cool for school, but I have a newsflash for you, Walter Cronkite... you aren't.

Derek Zoolander

Now if you'll excuse me, I have an after-funeral party to attend.

Derek Zoolander

At the Derek Zoolander Center For Children Who Can't Read Good And Wanna Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too, we teach you that there's more to life than being really, really good looking.

Derek Zoolander

I can Dere-lick my own balls, thank you very much.

Derek Zoolander

Mer-man! *keh... keh... keh...* MER-MAN!

Derek Zoolander

What is this, a center for ants? How can we be expected to teach children to learn how to read if they can't even fit inside the building? The center has to be at least... three times bigger than this!

Derek Zoolander

SNAP

Derek Zoolander

Words can only hurt you if you try to read them. Don't play their game.

Derek Zoolander

Todd! Are you not aware that I get farty and bloated with a foamy latte?

Mugatu

Let me show you Derelicte. It is a fashion, a way of life inspired by the very homeless, the vagrants, the crack whores that make this wonderful city so unique.

Mugatu

Oh, I'm sorry, did my pin get in the way of your ass? Do me a favor and lose five pounds immediately or get out of my building like now!

Mugatu

As a caterpillar becomes a butterfly, so must you become Derelicte!

Mugatu

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